One of my favorite life concepts was introduced by a good friend of mine, Mark Battiato, at a Mastery Summit conference we hosted. In one of the break out sessions, he was asking Dr. Brian Gray (of Washington, DC) about his family. Brian told him he had 3 children and the oldest daughter was 13. After Brian finished, Mark said to him:
“WELL, YOU ONLY HAVE 3 SUMMERS LEFT WITH YOUR OLDEST DAUGHTER.”
Brian, disturbed, irritated, and perplexed said to him, “That is ridiculous…what do you mean?”
Mark replied, “When she turns 16, her schedule will be so heavy with friends and other activities that you won’t be able to get away and connect with her like you used to do. So, basically you have 3 summers left with her. Make them count.”
Brian said that hit him like a ton of bricks. Those words have been burning in his brain ever since.
Summer triggers different memories for all of us. Most of them relate back to our childhood. For some of us they are fantastic images of packing the big blue station wagon with the wood paneling on the side to drive across the country to DisneyWorld and the Epcot Center. Packed in the back seat with your brothers and sisters without seatbelts. They weren’t the safest practices back then, but make no mistake, they were experiences that left us with great images of the important times of our lives. These are images that we will carry for the rest of our lives. When asked about what we enjoyed most about our lives, we will always recall these images.
Don’t let the guilt of having to work or leaving your practice get in the way of what you really want out of life. One thing is for sure, “Everyone dies…but very few people ever REALLY LIVE.”
Really living is being present for the important images that you, your spouse and your children will carry for the rest of their lives. Summer is the opportunity to create these images.
Take the time to count the number of summers you have left with your kids, especially the older ones. Make an effort to make every one of them “memorable.”
Here are tips to make sure that your summers are incredibly memorable for everyone that is important to you:
1. Do something memorable this summer – Get out of your dental office as soon as you can. It doesn’t have to be expensive...just MEMORABLE. Don’t spend the summer working long hours. Get out of your office and live your life. One of my mentors, Jeffrey Gitomer, once said that the key to living a great life is, “When you have the choice of doing 2 things, do the one that is most MEMORABLE.” Make some good memories stick this summer.
2. Change your hours now – I’ve said it a million times, but there isn’t a dentist in the world who has to work past 5 pm. There just isn’t any good reason to do so. If you work past 5 pm, my guess is that you haven’t given your patients a good enough reason to come in during the hours before 5 pm. Send a clear message to yourself, your team and your patients that you value your life and your family by putting an end to your evening hours. The same goes for weekends. Life is too short to be working on Saturdays. Get rid of Saturday work and improve your life instantly. The best time to do all of this is now – at the beginning of summer. I have seen a lot of practices change their hours to 7-3 and never change them back. Figure out how you want to experience your days. Get the most out of them. Have dinner with your family. Change your hours now...and don’t change them back in the fall. You’ll never regret it.
3. Take LOTS of photos – People think in images. We would hope that our brain does a good job of remembering all of these images as we grow older but it doesn’t. Taking pictures helps us recall the most memorable times of our lives. Invest in a really nice digital camera for your family. It’s easier than ever to take an unlimited amount of pictures and share them instantly with those you love. Purchasing a nice digital camera will be some of the best money you ever spend. Also, get really good at rounding people up and taking “group pictures” at all times. You will find that your kids often remember the specifics about the pictures rather than the actual experiences themselves. So please...take LOTS of pictures.
4. Make sure you are IN the photos – Another thing that you want to get good at is passing the camera to strangers and asking them to take a picture of you and those you love. Too many times parents back out of the photo opportunity for vanity reasons or because they don’t want to inconvenience others by asking them to take a picture.
Too many people make the mistake of not getting into the picture. Make sure that when your kids look back at all the great pictures that you took that they actually see Mom and Dad in the pictures. It does 2 things: #1) It shows them that you were in fact present for the important times of their lives and #2) It shows (clearly) that you love and value being TOGETHER. Trust me, this is a biggie. Just count the number of Christmas cards you get every year where you only see a picture of your friend’s kids and not the parents. What a tragedy! Show everyone (most importantly your kids) that you love being together and you are not afraid to get in the picture.
5. Document your summer (and your life) – When you have taken the pictures document them in a way that people can easily view. Make sure you back them up to an online storage vehicle like Google Picasa. Great resources like the Apple Photo Books product and www.blurb.com allow us to create really inexpensive photo books that enable our families to look back on, and cherish, these images. Dr. Stephen Malone (from Knoxville, TN) creates a family yearbook every year to document these memories. What a great idea.
Be sure that people can tell a good story about your life when it is over by showing a life well lived with an amazing assortment of pictures.
6. Plan next summer – If you have ever valued your summers you understand that you are not alone. The prime beach and park locations are usually flooded (even in this economy) with NO VACANCY signs. Be sure to make planning ahead a habit every summer. Book early enough so you can go where and when you really want to go. It will be a discipline that will serve you well.
Summer is a time for the magic in your life to come alive. Take this opportunity to fully live and experience all the blessings you have been given.
Count the number of summers you have left with each child...and make sure each one of them is more spectacular that the last.
Remember…your children only get one childhood….so make it memorable.
Have a fantastic summer!
Kirk Behrendt
Speaker & Coach
ACT Dental Practice Coaching
800.851.8186
www.actdental.com
www.kirkbehrendt.com
visit our blog at www.actdentalblog.com
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Kirk Behrendt is a practice performance coach, international speaker and author. Kirk has invested his entire professional life studying the elite practices in dentistry and the leadership that guides them. As the founder of ACT, his vision is driven by the commitment to provide highly personalized care to the dental profession. By creating a talented team of experts, Kirk and his team continue to positively impact the practice of dentistry one practice at a time. His personal mission is to use up every ounce of his potential. Kirk lectures all over the world to help individuals take control of their own lives. Kirk has competed internationally in 4 Ironman Triathlons and 9 Half-Iron Triathlons. He currently trains with some of the best triathletes competing in the world today. His feeling is that there is no greater parallel to optimal business performance than optimal athletic performance. He loves cycling, basketball, stand-up comedy, and most of all, spending time with his wife, Sarah, and children Kinzie, Lily, Zoe & Bo. His email address is kirk@actdental.com |
